In case you thought your insecurities were some form of a “fish hook” to get compliments or affirmations from people to make your life better, think again. Insecurities can actually be very detrimental to your health and life. Before we dive into what insecurities cause, let’s look at the prefix meaning of the word insecurity. “In” means “not”… therefore if you have an “in” in front of security, you’re in big trouble my friend. That means you’re not secure about something in particular. Question for you? When has any insecurity in your life ever brought you any victory? Let’s take a look at six main reasons why insecurities are bad for you and can destroy you slowly.
#1 Insecurities causes dependency – If you’re insecure, you’re always fishing for compliments, hoping someone will affirm you “again and again” and your mood changes based on people’s reassurance or applause. Be careful with this, this is an area Satan knows all too well and uses it as a form of idolatry. Yes, you can idolize having constant affirmations from people in order to feel happy about yourself, your talents, your career, your relationships, you name it. If you’re feeling insecure about something, go talk to your daddy, “Abba Father” to be specific. Now don’t get me wrong, affirmations are good to have once in a while, but they shouldn’t be your bread and butter. Psalm 94:19 – When anxiety was great within me, your consolation brought me joy.
#2 Fear – When you’re insecure about yourself, fear can creep in. Fear about your future, your potential, your purpose, and doubt starts to creep in. You have to be careful how you view yourself. It all begins with you and your thoughts, what type of thoughts do you entertain? Do you speak life over yourself, or do you speak death. A good way of gauging which kingdom rules in your mind is by speaking what you hear in your thoughts out loud (of course whisper it, you never know what may come out that will shock you). When you hear yourself, you will reflect more and be alert as to what goes on in your mind. Speak words of affirmation over yourself so that fear does not creep in and speak the word of God over yourself, which is ultimately the best way to affirm yourself and your insecurity. Keep your mind in check and determine yourself to be in control of your thoughts. Place every single thought under the obedience of Christ. 2 Timothy 1:7 – For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.
#3 Envy, jealousy, dishonoring others – The people in this life who are the most insecure are the ones who live their lives backbiting, gossiping about others, never happy about other people’s promotions, and envy creeps in. Now, people can be really good at disguising these feelings from others by simply smiling and pretending to be happy for you. However, your inner thoughts and emotions will reflect in your body (body language, actions and your health). If you think i’m kidding, here’s a Bible verse for ya… Proverbs 14:30 – A peaceful heart leads to a healthy body; jealousy is like cancer in the bones. If you do not correct your emotions, it doesn’t matter whether people see it or not, God sees it. Insecurities can actually cause you to dishonor others as well. If you’re jealous because you don’t have a position of authority or leadership, you can be disrespectful to them. Or you could be jealous of someone’s talent or attention they are receiving. This only means one thing, your identity in Christ is unstable. If you know God esteems you and has a great purpose for your life, the spirit of insecurity won’t take over. Insecurities can cause you to also become an “Absalom.” Absalom was the third son of David. In this story, you see Absalom gradually undermining King David, usurping his authority and speaking against him to the people. Under the pretense of honoring a vow, he sent messengers throughout the land, proclaiming his kingship. (Don’t allow your insecurities or selfishness to rule you, let God’s law prevail in your heart. You could likely miss out on God’s blessings if you do those things).
#4 Weak character – Insecurities mean you will foster a weak character. You become double minded and you don’t really know where you stand. I’m not saying that there won’t be times of weakness, I am speaking about character in general. People gravitate towards confident people and of strong character. If you’re always speaking defeat or insecurities, no one will feel secure around you. If you wish to confide your insecurities with someone, be wise with whom you share it with. Not everyone cares and not everyone will give you wise godly counsel. If you’re feeling insecure, let God deal with that in your heart and ask Him to help you overcome it. Also, when you portray a life of insecurity or low self-esteem, people will treat you as such. Why? Because you’ve allowed people to form this concept about you and when people smell insecurity, they think it’s an automatic pass to mistreat you or undermine you.
#5 You can get defensive/possessive- When you’re insecure, you feel a constant reason to prove to people something. This could be as a result of people undermining you and it leaves you feeling insecure and resentful. Or you’re insecure about something you think you may never accomplish and get defensive every time someone asks you about your dreams, career, children, future marriage. You’re never at peace in your heart because you don’t believe in yourself nor God’s plans for you. This doesn’t happen to everyone, but it is definitely one of those things that can happen when you let insecurity rule you. Here’s an example, if you’re single and insecure, if you find yourself trying to prove to others that you are happy when you’re single, but you’re not. Then you know something is wrong. Or it could be the other way around, you’re pretending to have a great marriage, but yet you’re insecure about it. You could also be insecure about someone ever seeing you as a potential partner in life, you’re worried that it won’t be you and you get possessive when you see others around that person. Or you can be trying to prove to someone that you earned a position and take every opportunity to explain yourself why you have that authority. Follow what Jesus did ——> Luke 20:8 – Jesus said, “Neither will I tell you by what authority I am doing these things.”
#6 You lose your joy – This is probably the one you should be concerned about the most. Insecurities can cause you to be too much in your head. Your lack of identity in a specific area of your life can lead you to lose joy. You can isolate yourself, bury your emotions because you never confronted them with God. Ask God to help you and His joy will be your strength. Remember what God says about you. Ephesians 2:10 – For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.
I hope this post helped you in some way. Remember that God says you are fearfully and wonderfully made. And when you’re weak, you are strong. There is no need to highlight nor exalt your insecurities, instead confront them head on. I’m not saying to be arrogant around people stating you don’t have insecurities, but instead of focusing on that…tackle those insecurities by receiving your reassurance/healing from God. Instead boast about how strong your God is… even in the midst of your weakness/insecurities. God bless you, child of God!